persnickety

I work at a fairly "hoity" restaurant that has a lot of food with French and Italian words in the description. Words like Ciabatta, Pugliese, Aperitifs, fromage, blah blah. Its great and all, but needless to say it attracts a certain demographic. Mostly these people are what we call "foodies" who have seen 2 or 3 shows on the Food Network and think they're as knowledgeable as Anthony Bordain.

So we serve homemade breads with olive oil with our meals. We serve a relatively good Extra Virgin Olive Oil with our breads for your culinary pleasure. BUT APPARENTLY we used to have a little bit higher quality olive oil with our breads, but have stopped serving it and only use it in our cooking, because it costs too much. (You'd be amazed how many people leave their bread and oil UNTOUCHED, shameful).

Fast forward to today, when these two women come in. They begin by asking me (the hostess) 324 questions about the menu, which they could totally get from their SERVER but chose to ask me. Oh, they also had a specific booth they wanted to sit in. And the mom left her sunglasses on the ENTIRE TIME. But I digress...

I bring them out some bread and olive oil and they proceed to tell me that they have a "special olive oil" in the office. You can imagine my surprise, since we keep NO FOOD PRODUCTS in the office. I walk upstairs and the owners wife is there, and I ask what the shiz they are talking about. There is no "special olive oil" for "them" its just the cooking stuff.

I then bring out their somewhat higher quality oil out and they proclaim "SUCH A DIFFERENCE!!!". I asked if I should take the "cheap" stuff away, and they said "OH, GOD YES!"

I walk back to the kitchen and try both of the olive oils. And I'm a bit of a foodie myself, and have quite high standards for olive oil and bread... and you know what? Can't. Tell. The. Difference.

Douche Bags.


Current Beer: Trader Joe's, Name Tag Classic Lager
Current Song old skool: The Humpty Dance, By Digital Underground
(ba-do-reeeeeeeer-do-reet, ba-do-reeeeer-do-reet, the Humpty Dance is your chance to do THE HUMP )

i'm like martha freaking stewart over here!

Herrrrrrrowww! (in best Kim Jong Il voice)

I hope you are all enjoying what is the wettest and rainiest of springs. I can not wait until the sunshine comes!

I have so much to tell you, but honestly, I don't even know where to start, or how to make it entertaining. So for now I'll show you some crafty things I've been up to in my quest to give up laziness for lent.

I totally painted this awesome tree on a door in my hallway. Its a weird vestibule like area with 5 doors and no wall space. So since I can't hang any pictures, I painted one! This is the door that goes to the upstairs, which is shut 99% of the time. I just used cheap acrylic paint from Wal-Mart and cut a few sponges. There's 3 different colors of green and one solid brown line for the stem. I think it turned out really well! And honestly took me about 10 minutes to do.

My aunt who used to live here, was the owner of a frame shop, which is on the property. So I've been using some of the old materials and framing some pictures of my own. The frame and glass were already cut, with some stupid picture inside. I've tried to teach myself how to use the mat cutter, since there's a million sheets of mats in various colors and sizes just sitting there. Not bad if I do say so myself! Its a picture I took at a market in Florence, Italy, and is now hanging in my kitchen! YAY ME!

HELLOOOOOO DOLLAR STORE CRAFTS! I used some wood glue and chopsticks to make a trivet. Awesomeness!

It hangs on the wall when its not in use. Me likey.

HOW Effing Cute is this?!?

My secret? They're Starbucks glasses. You know, those premade frappucino things. I enjoy vanilla.

I peeled the stickers off, washed them out, and spray painted them white. Then I found some rub-on letters at the craft store and put "milk" in differing languages on them. I still want to do one that says MILCH (german) and LATTE (Italian).

They make super cute flower vases. I'm holding some (deadish) daffodils. Need to go pick some new ones!!

And a fun story for you...

I went to a concert on Monday night. It was Bad Religion and Rise Against, pretty punk/hard rock. Anyway, I was jumping around and dancing about in the mosh pit, and some guy totally knocked me down and I twisted my ankle all the hell. Nothing makes you feel old like injuring yourself in the pit. SERIOUSLY!?

Now its all bruised and swollen and pretty gross looking. I'm currently icing and elevating as I type this. But its pretty awesome gimping around work and having people ask me what happened. I can't stop myself from giggling and the ridiculousness of it.

I ooze Awesome from every pore.

you just blew my mind

yes, I am alive!!

My dear blogging friends!!

I miss you so much!!! Seriously, I'm not lying!!! :)

I have news!

I've been missing because I got a job!!! WOOO HOOOOO!!

Its nothing major, I'm working as a hostess at a restaurant for lunches. Its only 16 hours a week, but its still something!! I'm hoping to get into serving there soon too, to make some bank tips, but I gotta "pay my dues", so-to-speak.

So that's why I've been gone.

That and the fact that its Spring Time and have been spending some time outside and trying to get a garden in order. Planting and playing in the dirt.

I've also been doing really good with my giving up "laziness" for lent too. Mostly with the yard work, but I've just been trying really hard to stay busy, and honestly, *sigh* blogging falls under laziness for me. DON'T GET ME WRONG. I love blogging!!! But once I sit down in front of the computer, its so easy for me to sit there for another 5 hours... I'm Le Lame. I know.

Anyway, I'll try to be back more often, but I thought I needed to tell you my success story!

I know its cheesy, but I do love you all. And miss you. But Mama's just busy now.

Funny and Totally TRUE Story:
After working 2 whole days, Monday and Tuesday, I was sitting in my pajamas on Wednesday morning at 10:30... I thought to myself... "Man, its nice to have a day off".........

THIS...

Was my thought after working TWO WHOLE DAYS.

Wow.

Right??!

Its a good thing I'm easing back into this thing part time!!!

Love you!! :)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

I write nearly the same post almost every St. Patrick's Day...

"There are only two kinds of people in the world, The Irish and those who wish they were."

God isn't that the truth. I get so sick of people claiming to be Irish on St. Patrick's day. We all know those these douchebags. They're everywhere. And they really seem to crawl out of the woodwork mid-March.

I'm sorry, but unless you have an Irish accent, or parents with an Irish accent, you're fucking American. Do you have a passport from Ireland? No? Then shutthefuckup. Good Lord.

I mean, I'm all for having pride in your heritage. I'm Dutch, Scotch (Scot? Whatever. Scotch just sounds cooler.) and German. But I sure as shit don't go running around in late September (check it, that's when Oktoberfest actually is) yelling how German I am, and kicking up my heels and doing a polka jig in my lederhosen. NO. My great-grandmother was German. That makes me about 1/8th German, and not enough to run around with the German flag on my back. It just makes me love beer. I'm pretty sure its in my genes. But I digress...

Take a look around today and tonight. Listen to the morons. According to the general population, about 86.49% of America claims to be "Irish." Too bad I have to listen to douchebags all day. And no, I don't believe that you always drink Guiness. Drink a fifth of Bushmills, and we'll talk.

Now don't get me wrong. I LOVE St. Patrick's day. I mean, any reason to drink more beer than usual, green or no, is a great day in my opinion. And bars like to make the beer cheaper.

I have no clue where I found the following article, and honestly it was several years ago, so I'm sorry I'm not citing the source. My bad. If anyone finds it, let me know, and I'll cite it as the IAPEC requires. (the Internet Anti-Plagarism Enforcement Committee. Yes I made that up)

Please let me clear up a few blatantly wrong ideas people seem to have about Paddy's day.

Firstly, the next time I meet someone who says that people in Ireland don’t celebrate Paddy’s day in Ireland, I am going to punch them in the face. How people ever got that misguided idea, I don't know.

Almost as bad is the idea that it is celebrated ’better’ in the U.S. Paddy’s day here is fun, no doubt, but at the end of the day all it is is people wearing green and getting drunk. In Ireland it is a national holiday, so no one works or goes to school. It is much more of a family holiday with every little town having a parade to celebrate. It is also a true cultural event with numerous ceili (singing and dancing festivals) and sporting events taking place. Of course there is a wild night of drinking after, but drinking isn't as central to the holiday as it is in the US.

It is PaDDy's day, not PaTTy's day - I cannot stress enough that seeing it written PaTTy's day makes most real Irish people physically ill.

And as for all the fighting about where Saint Patrick came from etc, historians aren’t even sure if the guy existed for definite, so everyone needs to relax on that score!

Have fun today and tonight, and Cheers! And no pinching, that's for middle schoolers.

Look at me! I'm Irish!!