wrong in all the right ways

Hiiiyoooooo!

I finally, FINALLY FINALLY all moved in! And I finally have internet! I'm sure you've all been there. Having moved in, but pacing the floor patiently waiting for the comcast guy to come, to get the internet and cable tv all set up. This must be what a heroin addict feels like, needing a fix. GIMME MY FIX CABLE MAN!!

Whew. The hard part is over now.

So I hope you all had a lovely holiday weekend. We had a big family dinner which is always interesting. Laughing, talking, lots of drama, whispering in one room, filling wine glasses in the next. Ohhhhh family. Isn't passive aggressiveness FUN!?! We took it fairly easy on the wine this year (as opposed to last Christmas when we drank 23 bottles of wine and there were 14 guests, two of whom were children and didn't drink and two were DD's and didn't drink... you do the math! WHOOP!) We did however have a turkey, a ham, elk roast and ANOTHER turkey. Seriously. We were worried about not having any leftovers. WRONG. Oh and not to mention the 15 pounds of mashed potatoes and SEVEN pies. We didn't even touch 2 of them. Ahhh!

On to other news, I now live with two kitties. The cutest kitties I have ever seen. Not so much that they are fluffy and adorable, but that they're INSANE and CRAZY and I love that about them. They are so entertaining :) I've re-named them (because I have no idea what they're names were before) Mischief and Mayhem. And boy do they live up to their names. I have video of Mischief chasing his tail in a tupperware tub. Too funny. But the best part is my mouser Mayhem. He's taken to playing in the bathtub. He likes to play with his fake mousies in the tub, flipping them up and around and pouncing on them. I think he likes that the shower curtain keeps them contained.

So anywhoodle... Cut to Saturday morning... 6:30 am...

*thump*
*thump thump*
*thud*
*thump*
*thud thud*

Sure enough. Mayhem. In the tub. With an actual dead mouse. Throwing it into the air, and attacking it. Kinda gross and kinda awesome at the same time. I let him play with it for another 30 minutes before I disposed of it. With tongs. LONG ass tongs.

But to THIS morning. 3:30 in the freaking am.
*thump*
*thump thump*
squeeeeeeeak!
*thud*
*thump* squeeeeeeeek!!
*thud thud*
squeeeek!

what they do, when i'm not home

Oh yeah. You guessed it. A LIVE mouse. Fucking alive, in my bathtub. Holy crap. I tried to get him to kill it. Meanwhile the other cat kept trying to worm in, and Mischief would grooooooooowl at him. Too funny. And again, kinda gross. I really felt bad for that poor mouse. Panting and panting. Kinda giving up on life, and yet still fighting. I don't have the heart to kill it. So I got my "mouse tongs" which have been officially repourposed and will never again touch food, and remove said victim and take it outside to the burning barrel. Hopefully he died quickly, cause I know there was no hope for the poor little guy.

And thus I leave you. Hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend! And hopefully I'll be around a little more again! Love you all!

And here's a special shout out to Dr. Monkey VonMonkerstein, whom I totally forgot to invite to my pretend blog party. OF COURSE you'd be invited!! I'm sorry I was in a rush when addressing my pretend invitations. I just assumed you'd get the invite on facebook ;D
*smooches*

my older brother

Business in the front... Party in the back. Gots to keep it clean!

Good day today. Someone today thought my brother was older than me.

He's 5 years younger than I.

SCORE!!

i'm the man in the box

texting... the weekend... and my other random thoughts...

I'm currently having a text conversation with a friend of mine. I normally don't mind having entire conversations in a text message. It happens a lot, especially when either party is at work or doing other things. However I have a few gripes about texting in general, and mostly directed at this friend, who would never even think of reading this blog, but I just feel it needs to be said.

1. For the love of God, use punctuation.
You don't have to be totally grammatically correct, but a little something goes a long ways in interpreting what the fuck you are trying to say. Last week he sent me this:

"oh makes more sense now what restaurant sounds fun"

I mean sweet Jesus, I had to read that 6 times, out loud, before I realized there were 3 sentences in there. And what makes things worse is this friend does this all the time. So you can understand my frustration when I have to decypher what he's saying. Texting is supposed to expedite communication, not slow it down and piss me the fuck off.

*note. One of the things I absolutely love about Mr. Man is that he uses complete senences. With punctuation. And big words. No abbreviation. THANK YOU!!

2. If I don't answer you right away it means I'm doing something.
I mean, really. This is not hard concept to grasp. I was texting, got in the shower, and stepped away from the conversation for 15 minutes. When I get out I get a text saying, "Hello? What happened to you?" I'm so sorry I didn't feel the need to tell you I was going to "brb" from a fucking text conversation. We're not IMing here jackass. I believe my exact response was "I was in the shower. Calm the fuck down."

Okay, this isn't really on a texting note, but still from the same conversation...

Just because you haven't heard of something doesn't mean its not cool. I mean, some jackass yesterday said "Who is The Who?" at the Superbowl halftime show. I nearly punched the guy.

You haven't heard of improv? I'm sorry you live such a sheltered life never leave the small college town you live in. Improv is awesome. Sometimes it isn't delivered awesomely, and isn't as funny as other times, but the concept itself is awesome. Please don't make fun of me or my friends cause you're an imbocile.

Mr. Man is starting in a dart league with some of his friends and I'm going to watch. Just because you haven't heard of a dart league doesn't mean they don't exist. And your sarcasm really isn't welcome when you mock the fact that just because YOU haven't heard of it, means its dumb.

Such superirority is really an annoying characteristic. Just because you feel that you're above hanging out in bars, and because you think having more than 3 beers on a weeknight is excessive, and because you aren't a "fan" of bars doesn't mean you need to look down upon those of us who don't feel that way. I'm sorry I love beer. I'm sorry my friends and I like to go out and have fun. I'm sorry we like to get rowdy, even on a school night. FOR SHAME! Wait... I take that back. I'M NOT SORRY!!!

BAH!

okay, rant over now.

Brother's wedding was AWESOME! So much fun. Really small, at a park town. About 20 close friends and family there. Then we went out for pizza and cupcakes. Its so my brother to do something like that. It was great fun! Mr. Man went with me, which was great since he was really excited to meet my family. Its really refreshing to meet someone who doesn't seem to be allergic to getting to know your family.

The Bride and Groom


The Fam
I'm either doing the robot,
or attempting to hide my brother's gut


Baby Bro and Me
shocking!


Myself and Mr. Man
not an awesome pic,
but you can see a profile view of his cuteness :)

Also this weekend Mr. Man and myself went with some friends to an Alice and Chains concert. I have to say, those guys can still rock! Their new front man does a great job with songs too. I was really impressed over all. Before we went I was thinking... Hmmm... I think I know maybe 4 Alice and Chains songs? But it turns out I remember at least 10 of them. Great show, and great times! But I'm going to think twice about seeing a show at a venue that doesn't serve alcohol. I mean... WTF?!?

This week I am housesitting/dogsitting for Baby Brother and his Mrs. Its nice to have a break from the 'rents house, and have a space of "my own" even if its for 3 days!

yes or no, circle one

BIG DAY EVERYBODY!! BIG DAY!!

First off, I officially have a boyfriend now! heheee. We've been spending a lot of time together and definitely enjoying each other's company, and it just feels so easy and nice. Anyway, last night we had the very cute, very middle school talk about "our situation" and its confirmed! :) I'm seriously giddy like a school girl. Can't stop grinning. But... anyway...

other big BIG BIG news!!

Today my little brother is getting MARRIED!!!!
So excited!!
Very small, only about 15 of us there, and then out for a group dinner, with (hopefully) copious amounts of wine and beer and champagne!

So excited!! Time to go get ready. Will take lots of pics!


ohhhhhhh they grow up so fast.

pass the alka seltzer

Ohhhhh Holiday Insanity!!

I literally spent all day yesterday in my pajamas. ALL DAY. No shower. I rolled out of bed (off the couch as per relatives had invaded my bedroom) and after the fam left I retired to the recliner with laptop and tv at the ready for a day of nothingness. And what a successful day I had!! I ate so many left overs on a 3-4 hour intervals. I'm pretty sure I've gained 10 pounds in the last week. And now that its all over and I feel this weight of stress had been lifted only to be replaced with sort of boredom also know as reality. As Bacon is My Lover so elequently put it "that so-full-it-hurts-to-move feeling makes your depression even worse. I barely feel like moving much less putting together words into coherent thoughts for people to read." Amen sista.

But all in all we had a great holiday. My cousin brought her two kids over on Wednesday and we had lots of catching up to do, over many many bottles of wine. Everyday was greeted with a mild hangover and food to be made and then eaten and more relatives to visit. Christmas eve we had her mother over for clam chowder dinner. I thought the kids were going to get slapped for constantly nagging "can we open one present now?" "what about NOW?" "NOW!!?!" Oh to be a kid again. We let them open ONE gift on christmas eve and they spend half the day finding the perfect one to open. And of course they had to wait until after dinner.

Christmas Day was awesome, again with a mild hangover, which was easily lifted by the corking of the champange. The other two bottles flowed very quickly. Mmmmmmm. Then the rest of the gang came over, and with a house of 14 people we ate. and ate. and ate. (a ham AND a turkey AND 15 pounds of potatoes) and drank. and drank. and drank (4 bottles of champagne, 10 of wine, and a few quarts of eggnog)!!! Oh such good times! We followed dinner with rounds of board games, Apples to Apples is still my favorite ever, but we also gave Pictionary Man a whirl as well as Taboo. Man do the kids love being in charge of the buzzer for Taboo. Love it a little too much actually. Ughhhhh. I really think the highlight of the evening was how many penises were drawn on that pictionary man. How else do you draw the clue of "shaft"??

Which of course was followed up by my lovely Boxing Day activities, mentioned above.

Whew! Its nice to be back to normal, but a little sad too. Mom and I finally have the house put back together, and the silver is almost all polished and put away. Today we're going to watch It's Complicated. I love that Meryl Streep!!

the frugal gourmet

Ya, thats right. Thats a box of wine carcass. It has been gutted and is being squeezed to the last drop. My mom, the eternal frugal gourmet. :)