Tuesday, December 7

Random *White Elephant* Shit Tuesday

As someone who has to participate in 3 (THREE!) White Elephant exchanges this year (not to mention the 2 "regular" gift exchanges) I was in need of some brilliant inspiration. Unlike some of my friends, I don't have a bevey previous years white elephant gifts to reuse. My friend has a "gorgeous" koi sculpture, that would be... a... centerpiece? ... kitchey bookend?... uhhhh... no idea. So needless to say its been the subject of regifting in her office for the last 6 years.

But for me, I want something awesome... and awful. But not like smelly gym socks awful, but "ohhhhhh my God where the HELL did you find THIS?! awful. After some careful research, this is what I've found, and want to pass the inspiration on to you dear friends :)

Best White Elephant Gifts:

1. Hubcaps for a car no one owns

2. Spam
Preferrably a giant Costco or Sam's Club size

3. Fake chest hair

 
4. Toilet seat

Tell me this isn't AWESOME!?!
5. The Clapper

6. Edible underwear


7. Old bowling pin
 
(most bowling alley's will sell old ones for $2-5)
8. A six-pack of really cheap beer.

9. A tourism guide book to Detroit
Or other comparable, un-touristy place

10. Wasabi Lip Balm
www.perpetualkid.com/wasabi-lip-balm
11. Dirt Scented Purfume

12. An Old Calendar
Believe it or not, you can reuse them! 
Google "when my 1998 calendar be good again" and you can find out that its good again in 2036!!

13. Rid or Nix Lice Elimination Kit

14. Picture of yourself on a coffee cup!

15. A framed, autographed picture of yourself. 
My personal favorite
HAPPY ShOPpiNg!

4 comments:

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Bowling pins rule.

badheadday said...

The guy who's wife got the "fuzzy love cuffs" took the Koi out of the running. I think it was his way of telling us to grow up. That bastard! I like also going to Ross, Goodwill or St. Vinnys and seeing what awesome statues they have there. I had a hideous frog I found at Joann's one year that was EPIC!

April said...

We have a container of prunes that has been circulating the White Elephant gift exchange for a few years now. Unfortunately, we someone got stuck with it TWO years in a row (not really sure how that happened...). My challenge is to offload that shit (hee hee) onto someone else this year!

Professor Chaos said...

I would really like an old bowling pin. I would redecorate the entire house around it.